Happy New Year!
Happy 2011 to all of those who read “This Army Life.”
It’s been quite an adventure for me these past two years and I’ve encountered so many great people in this military family. Some who continue to help me with the trials I’m enduring and others who are just all around great people. I’m thankful for each and every one of you who despite the fact I’ll soon be leaving this “bubble,” still love and care for me like no other. I wish I could meet with each of you in a room, give you a hug, and thank you for being just plain awesome.
I said it a lot before, but I’m really glad this blog seems to still attract so much traffic and help others. I hope you can learn from my experiences and apply them to your own situations. This life is extremely difficult but it can also be so rewarding. My circumstances in leaving my husband were a little unique, but as tough as it was, I really enjoyed being a military spouse. I’d say I’d do it all over again, but at the same time…I think I’m a little scarred from my experience. Marrying someone in the military at war time is extremely fragile. Everything changes.
Anyway, I wish everyone the BEST for 2011. That your family and friends who serve are always safe, protected, and know how much we love them. Please continue to read, leave comments, and let me know how I can help you all.
Thanks!
Shannon
2010 in review
The stats helper monkeys at WordPress.com mulled over how this blog did in 2010, and here’s a high level summary of its overall blog health:
The Blog-Health-o-Meter™ reads Wow.
Crunchy numbers
The average container ship can carry about 4,500 containers. This blog was viewed about 21,000 times in 2010. If each view were a shipping container, your blog would have filled about 5 fully loaded ships.
In 2010, there were 66 new posts, growing the total archive of this blog to 144 posts. There were 77 pictures uploaded, taking up a total of 17mb. That’s about 1 pictures per week.
The busiest day of the year was November 24th with 328 views. The most popular post that day was My Thankful List.
Where did they come from?
The top referring sites in 2010 were twitter.com, facebook.com, blogger.com, sempergumbythelife.blogspot.com, and search.aol.com.
Some visitors came searching, mostly for thankful, sad couple, dear john movie poster, pcos, and army girlfriend.
Attractions in 2010
These are the posts and pages that got the most views in 2010.
My Thankful List November 2009
1 comment
I Am A Military Girlfriend November 2009
5 comments
Dear John January 2010
3 comments
Post Deployment Blues December 2009
What is PCOS? January 2010
7 comments
Merry Christmas!
I just want to take a minute to wish everyone who reads “Welcome to THE Life” a Merry Christmas!
Most of you are obviously part of a military family or will be someday in the future. Perhaps some of you are missing the one you love at your Christmas table this year. I know from personal experience how all of that can feel and I hope that you’re at least given some sort of comfort by those who are around you. There will be many people praying for you, including myself this weekend. Thank you for your sacrifices and all you continue to do to support the ones you love and our country.
~Shannon~
Looking Back
*I started writing this post over a month ago. Just never got around to finishing it*
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For those of you who keep up with my other blog, it will come as no surprise. But to those of you who don’t, my husband and I are getting a divorce. I’ve watched my marriage go down the tubes for quite some time now, hence the reason my last post was in June and I mentioned a new blog and my life going in a different direction. This blog represented my life in the military family, that life is now coming to an end any day now. It was short, it wasn’t always sweet, and this has left me with an entirely different perspective on military life.
I’ve noticed some people on my Twitter feed saying things like “Just because it didn’t work out for you, doesn’t mean this whole lifestyle is bad.” I don’t know if those messages are aimed at me or not, but one can assume. I feel I need to clarify my position on this whole situation. I don’t have less of pride for this country or for our military, but I am deeply saddened and disturbed by all that is happening with our men and women in uniform and their families. I completely understand that not every service member is like my husband. I am so thankful for that. I understand many are more resilient than others and others can cope and manage better than others. Heck, even some wives do better than others right?
I write this because I’m not the only one I know who has been in this situation or is currently going through this situation.
It breaks my heart that there are women who sit in silence in unhappy marriages and deal with violence, anger, and abuse on a daily basis. They feel that this is what they signed up for. They knew it was a possibility as a military spouse and they have to own it. They’re stuck, with children or without a job and financial independence. They are consistently told things will change and they cling to the hope one day those words will be true. We all know domestic violence knows no boundaries and it isn’t JUST a military thing. However, with what our men and women are exposed to on a daily basis…it makes them more susceptible to act out in violence themselves on those around them.
I can’t fathom what it is like to experience what my husband and what other service members have been through. I will never understand and that is something my husband reminded me of when we were dating. My heart hurts for my husband and for others who serve. That may sound like pity, but that’s not what I mean. I wish I could make the wars go away. I wish daddies were home for their babies births. I wish mommies could be stateside to take care of their children and see them in other ways besides photos and webcam. I wish all military members came back 100% whole, both physically and mentally. I’ve always been a supporter of military and if that means war, it means war. Most of you know I am a conservative, so I support military action entirely. I would never be one to say “End the war and bring our troops home!” Now, I find myself saying just that. The hurt, the pain, and the destruction it causes in the people we love just sucks. I don’t care what ANYONE says. Anyone who is deployed and is called to action, is never the same again. It will change you.
My heart hurts for my husband. Our marriage was on many occasions a nightmare and our divorce has been extremely exhausting and ugly. I could spew 1,000 words of disgust right now but in truth…I love my husband and I’m sad it has come to this. I am sad that I feel the military had a major part in his behavior. They claim he has Multiple Sclerosis but I feel STRONGLY there is something else going on. MS has nothing to do with violence and anger. I feel like though not entirely to blame, this life is what ended up turning our lives upside down. It was not the sacrifice. It was not living in Texas. It was not separations, late nights, or low pay. It was how he came back a different person.
Many who know our story may say it was probably the fact our courtship was “not normal” and was quick. We both agree that had we lived together prior to getting married, we probably wouldn’t have gotten married. We’ll never know. I do know the man who I knew for 11 years and the man I knew in Iraq was not the man who came home to Fort Hood, Texas. That hurts. Really bad. I’d give anything to shake this out of him and get that man back. I knew it would never happen and I made the choice to leave, sooner than later. We started therapy, counseling, programs, everything right from the start. I am thankful that his chain of command recognized the seriousness of the problem and got him help right away. I encourage any military spouses or partners out there to seek the help of the COC and/or Family Advocacy if they are experiencing violence or abuse at the hands of their service member. This includes verbal, financial, emotional, and physical. NONE of it is acceptable.
I was walking in the grocery store parking lot today and had this overwhelming feeling that I was marked. I’m marked as no longer a military spouse. No longer a wife. Alone. Out of “the club.” There are many things I will miss about being a part of this life. I met some incredible people and connected with so many on Twitter and through this blog. I will miss the unity, the understanding, the compassion, and the closeness this life brings. It takes some kind of woman to stand behind a man in uniform. Though my time as a military girlfriend and wife was short, I have learned so much. I will forever have some amount of digital ACU camo in my blood 😉
To those who have shown me support over the past two years, I appreciate it so much. I came to some of you early on when M and I were dating and expressed concerns over some issues and you were right there with me. I’m thankful to my milspouse friends who I still speak with and continue to encourage me, even though I will soon “no longer belong.” I am in awe of all of you who stand behind your husbands, boyfriends, sons, etc. If I could reach out and give a hug to each of you I would. I admire your strength, your courage, and your sacrifice.
I am not sure what place I will take within the military community. I still feel drawn to champion military causes, but in what aspect I do not know. In time, with healing and a clear mindset, I’m sure it will become apparent to me. I will continue to pray for all of you and ask that you do the same for both myself and “M.”
Thank you for all of your comments over the past two years. It amazes me this blog still receives TONS AND TONS of hits and continues to help those who are starting out on their journey. I pray it continues to do so, long after the dust has settled and this chapter in my life has closed.
I just have to say…
After a friend of mine posted a really great status update thanking our military and encouraging everyone else to do so, an ignoramus wrote a really idiotic statement.
Your statement about freedom is correct. They no longer fight for our freedom however. That is their motivation but they are instead used to fight for someones personal gain. We need to wake up our soldiers to the tyranny that is upon us.
EXCUSE ME A-HOLE?!? Here’s my response to him:
Wow. I’m extremely offended by Lucca’s statement. It’s the ignorant people like that, that concern me and make me think this country is going in the wrong direction. It’s sad when people listen to the media about everything that is going WRONG in Iraq & Afghanistan. Nobody hears the good that people like my husband do like building soccer fields for kids, cleaning neighborhoods from trash to treasures, and so much more. It seriously disgust me people can be so small-minded. I guess you suppose we’d still have our freedoms if they all came home and we totally dissolved our military right? Intelligent.
Lastly, I took to my own status to write the following:
I’m really sick and freaking tired of ignorant a-holes who insult our military and the mission. Don’t speak about something you have NO IDEA ABOUT. If you’re that stupid to consistently base your opinions on the media, you shouldn’t be opening your mouth. It makes you look more ridiculous than you already are.
Thoughts anyone?
Happy Belated 4th & Such
Hey everyone! I hope you all had a very relaxing and enjoyable 4th of July yesterday. My husband & I spent ours being lazy around the house. We decided not to brave the massive crowds at Fort Hood’s Freedom Fest. I don’t know how you all feel about it, but I greatly dislike when events are open to the public on post. I don’t live on post and I can’t imagine how those folks feel. Granted, anyone can basically come on post with an acceptable ID but MASSIVE AMOUNTS of civilians on post on a holiday celebrating our freedom? Call me paranoid, but I think it’s excessive. I saw some comments on the Fort Hood MWR Facebook fan page that got me thinking. Someone had commented about how the mission of the MWR is to support the troops and their families…NOT involve the civilian population. What do you all think? I tend to agree. I think it’s perfectly acceptable to allow civilians on post to learn about this life, but to allow a free for all on major holidays and for major events…I don’t think so.
Anyway, we did enjoy some time this weekend with a few Army friends. It was really nice to spend time with people on our level…busy with school, working, no kids, etc. We had a blast. Thanks Sarah! ❤
Less than 2 weeks and we’ll be on a jet plane to Vegas. HOLLA!
Oh, and thank you all so much for the comments I receive on this blog. I love getting comments (like one I did yesterday) on how the older posts I’ve made have helped other people through their deployments. I’m glad you all can identify with those and if you are facing an upcoming deployment or are smack in the middle of one, go backwards in my blog and perhaps you’ll find some things useful.
The Anti-Army Wife
So is there an “Official Code” of army wives? If so, what do you think is in it? As time goes on, I consider myself the “Anti-Army Wife.” Before you get your tail feathers ruffled, it doesn’t mean I am anti army, it means I don’t feel like I fit the “mold” of military spouse. I’m not going to get into too much detail on that, because my personal beliefs might offend others. But for example, looking around post (and off) most spouses my age have been married a few years and have a couple kids. Not me. To be honest, it makes it really difficult.
I don’t talk too much here about our miscarriage, but it adds insult to injury walking around everywhere and the “norm” being families. I have not adjusted well to life here. It’s not easy to find other girls to spend time with because they are busy with play dates and changing diapers. I take care of a baby 50+ hours a week at work and emotionally, I am not able to be around “families” too often.
Another reason I feel out of place, is I have a job. Now before people get upset about that one…I’m not saying all military spouses don’t have jobs…but a lot that I know…don’t. I can accurately say that 75% of the girls I’ve met don’t. Literally. 3 out of 4 girls I know don’t have them. While there’s nothing wrong with choosing not to work or staying at home, it’s yet another thing that separates me from connecting with other girls here. I work 50+ hours a week and I live 30 minutes from post. When I get off work around 6/6:30, I don’t feel like driving a half hour to go hang out for an hour and get home at 9pm. Not to mention, that leaves me no time with my husband. Also, I don’t have the luxury of just being able to take off and do whatever, whenever. I can’t go grab some coffee in the afternoon, go work out at the gym together, or just go hang out and shop during the day. I work. Tonight, I had to go to USAA and deposit my pay. There’s only one branch, it’s 30 min away…next to post. Then, I had to run to Target and then, I went tanning. I barely made it home by 8:00pm. My husband passed out about an hour later. It’s exhausting.
So, there ladies and gents are a few reasons I feel like I don’t fit the mold of Army Wife. I don’t mean for it to sound whiny, but I really can’t wait to get back to “normal life.” I don’t hate or dislike this life, it’s just not something I want to be a part of forever.
Sin City List
Vegas. Sin City. The city that never sleeps. It’s awesome!
DH & I are headed there next month on our first “real” vacation. Seriously excited doesn’t even being to describe it. It will be my third trip, but his first.
There are so many military discounts out there, including ones specifically for travel. Since Vegas is such a popular destination, I’m curious to know what discounts are available here. I’ve found quite a few and will continue to add to this list and move it to the top of my blog. If you know of some or stumble across some on the web, PLEASE post a comment with any info you have including contact information and websites, etc. There really isn’t a comprehensive website for military discounts in Vegas, so hopefully this post will help those of you planning a trip!
Military Discounts in Las Vegas
1. Cirque du Soleil ~ KA at MGM Grand
Active Duty Military Personnel receive 35% off of the $99, $130 and $150 tickets. This offer is not valid on existing orders and is subject to availability. Limit 4. Some restrictions may apply. Must present valid military ID at box office.
2. I have heard that certain airlines will waive checked baggage fees for active duty military and dependents. It doesn’t hurt to ask!
3. Funny man Frank Caliendo is offering a BOGO for tickets to his show. All you have to do is head to the Monte Carlo Box Office with a valid military ID or call 702.730.7160. http://myvegasscene.com/blog/military-personnel-receive-buyonegetone-free-tickets/
4. Cirque du Soleil “Mystere” at Treasure Island ~ Discounted for active military, and children under 12 years old: $54.50, $49.50, $39.50, $34.50, and $30.00 (Plus tax and non-refundable service fee) Child and Military discounts are not available online, and must be purchased by either calling the TI Box Office at 702-894-7722, or by visiting a Cirque du Soleil Box Office in person.
5. Cirque du Soleil “Zumanity” at New York, New York ~ 35% off Zumanity tickets with valid military ID can be purchased by calling 866-606-7111 or at the Box Office.
6. Cirque du Soleil “The Beatles LOVE” at The Mirage ~ 25% off LOVE tickets with valid military ID can be purchased by calling 800-963-9634 or at the Box Office.
7. Cirque du Soleil “Criss Angel, Believe” at Luxor ~ 35% off CRISS ANGEL Believe tickets with valid military ID can be purchased by calling 800-963-9634 or at the Box Office.
8. Feel like gettin’ hitched or renewing your vows in Vegas? Military Service personnel: Book your wedding with us & Viva Las Vegas Wedding Chapels will pay the Minister Fee $60.00* Must provide a current Military I.D. Card to receive this discount. This military discount is valid with any wedding package at the regular price. This discount can not be combined with coupons, or wedding package specials. http://www.vivalasvegasweddings.com/index.htm
9. Terry Fator at The Mirage ~ All Military Personnel will receive a 25% discount. This offer is not valid on existing orders and is subject to availability. Some restrictions may apply. *This pricing is only available through phone reservations and box office purchases and your Military ID must be presented at pick-up. http://www.mirage.com/entertainment/terry-fator.aspx
10. The Platinum Hotel offers 25% off military wedding packages, receptions, and group events. http://www.theplatinumhotel.com/specials-and-promotions/military-discount.cfm
11. Circus Circus offers 10% off on 2 night minimum stays. https://reservations.mgmmirage.com/bookingengine.aspx?pid=CCC&host=promo&code=nmilx10&kbid=275588&sub=vhs-nmilx10-ccc
12. Larry G. Jones offers military both past and present a free ticket to his show on Fremont Street. http://www.larrygjones.com/veteransfree.html
13. Active Duty Military Personnel and Civil Service Employees receive special discounts off Carrot Top and Fantasy tickets at The Luxor. Call 702-262-4400 for details.
14. Active Duty receive a 30% discount at the spa at The Rio! http://www.riolasvegas.com/casinos/rio/casino-misc/rio-spa-and-salon-detail.html
15. Red Rock Resort offers 20% off at their spa also! http://www.redrocklasvegas.com/spa/
Helping Animals in the Gulf
Who agrees that this oil spill has gotten OUT OF CONTROL? I know we all do. Do you remember the commercials for Dawn dish soap that showed them cleaning animals with their product during a spill years ago? I do. Have you seen the campaign on Facebook for hair collection? I have. These are just a couple things you can do to help our animals and our environment during this crisis.
My good friend Patty contacted The Wildlife Care Center in Florida to find out what they need and how we can directly help. Below is the list given to her, along with the address of where to send these supplies. Please help! You can buy bottles of dish soap for a buck at regular stores, not to mention a lot of this stuff you can get from the dollar store! If you have older children or teach, consider getting the kids involved by donating their allowance or doing a drive.
It was a pleasure to speak with you earlier today. Below is a list of items that we are in need of. Furthermore, here is a link to several stories, updating you on our current work/watch in the Gulf: http://www.humanesociety.org/news/gulf_oil_spill_response.html
The Wildlife Care Center is gearing up to help animals affected by the oil spill in the Gulf. If you are in the South Florida region and want to help, The WCC is in need of the following supplies:
• Dawn detergent
• 10-20 gallon or larger galvanized aluminum, or other sturdy tubs for washing oiled animals
• Cardboard pet carriers
• Neoprene gloves (dishwashing gloves that come up to the elbow)
• Protective eyewear
• Q-tips
• Soft toothbrushes
• Pepto-Bismol
• Soft sided playpens (foldable) to house oiled or cleaned birds
• Above-ground metal frame pool for easy storage and assembly
• Eye wash (saline)
• Measuring cups
• Heating pads
• Heat lamps
• Fans
• Digital thermometers
• Thermometers with calibration up to 106 Fahrenheit
• Spray attachments for hoses
• Rubber boots
• Unflavored pedialyte
• Protective suits (Tyvek)
• Fishing landing nets
• Sheets, blankets, towels
Wildlife Care Center
3200 SW 4th Ave.,
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33315.
Phone: 954-524-4302
Thank you!
Laura
Laura Gottlieb
Director of Development, Wildlife Care Center
lgottlieb@humanesociety.org
main 954.524.4302 x52 direct 954.524.7864
cell 954.629.2540 fax 954.343.0762
Wildlife Care Center
3200 SW 4th Avenue Fort Lauderdale, FL 33315
Welcome to THE Life 